Twenty-Six Years In
Dear Dungarees,
September 14, 1996 The articles of incorporation for the Matthew and Trisha Kinsey household were put into place. 26 years ago two ridiculous tiny baby-adult humans said I do. Marriage is hard and beautiful then hard and beautiful again. And super weird. You get married young and cute and wake up 26 years later old and cute sleeping next to a man who eats his salad with a spoon.
26 years married to Fine Farmer today. I keep saying it, t-w-e-n-t-y-s-i-x-y-e-a-r-s and it sounds so…peculiar. Like it happened to someone else entirely, yet, here we sit. 26 years in. Adorable, disheveled, holding hands, in our comfy clothes, and ready for whatever the next 26 years have in store but equally ready for a nap.
I have yet to meet a couple who has the same answer to "What makes a successful marriage?" The question is more hypothetical really since no one knows the answer I'm certain. However, if you do know please, write a book, and I'll buy 10 copies.
Getting married young was not a popular life choice among our peers. As so often the heart wants what the heart wants we said “I do” in spite of the naysayers. We got married in 1996 and listened to Jewel’s album on repeat for the first few months of marriage. Today I heard “You Were Meant for Me” by Jewel and I thought...how fitting.
Those who know me know I’m pretty transparent. Our marriage almost didn’t make it a few years back. But we grew up and grew in. In-tentional, in-tensive, in-timacy. Intentional in our relationship, words, actions, and choices. We learned all about this alarming land of intensive marriage therapy, and emotional intimacy. Not for the faint of heart I assure you. We threw off some unhealthy patterns, tossed out addiction, and got remarried in 2018. Now this doesn’t mean it’s been easy or smooth and the jury is still out on how many satisfaction stars marriage actually gets, but it is a work in progress and we are progressing. Hard times, good times, 7 kids, adoption, many moves, renewing of vows, building a home, building a life. We continue to build. High fives Fine Farmer. We made it another year.
Thank you Jewel for singing about us today. Thanks to our parents who continue to model lifelong commitment 50 plus years into this thing called marriage and thank you for praying for us through the years. To all of you who have supported and loved us these last 26 years, hugs galore! Here’s to 26 more!
