We Interrupt Usual Farmy Things For Football
Dear Dungarees,
In the aftermath of the events that shaped a nation, we honor the fallen 9er fans and shed light upon this very real, emotion filled time. The stages of grief, Super Bowl edition.
* Denial.
The quickest stage. Punctuated by joking and smiles not fully reaching the eyes, food and much texting to family in other locations as hope dwindles. The football fan holds his hopes together with his fingers to his face, or hands to the back of his neck. Lamaze breathing often arrives at the end of this phase but can be present in all other stages.
* Anger.
Regretfully, he continues to root for this team, wondering why he keeps doing this to himself. Pacing happens here. And looking away from the tv while making guttural sounds. Often at shocking volumes. He holds his anger in check with his hands to his face and drives the trajectory of the ball with his neck and shoulder muscles in vain. He will eat his emotions in this stage. Be prepared for your football fans future needs. Have tums at the ready.
* Bargaining.
Skipped entirely
* Depression.
This is often the hardest stage to watch. Words that follow in the stage may be bleak or unpleasant to hear, often out of character. There will be blatant name-calling using a football player's last name in the Super Bowl epitaph; followed by a statement like “That right there…that was the game.” The sand in the hourglass has run out. Just be near to your football fan, be present and know this stage won’t last forever.
* Acceptance.
A reflective pause quickly followed by looking away from the tv and everyone he holds close. No eye contact for a moment of silence please. This is alone time. Time to process and breathe into the spaces loss has created. Stricken with vain regret, over the course of the evening he will take his wounded heart and put it on a shelf until next season.
In these trying times, it may feel as if there is not much you can do. Don’t underestimate the power of presence. Resist the urge to fix. Just be near offering support to your football fan and know you are not alone. Others join you fighting the good fight. Your football fan will get through this and so will you….
Like our Lord and Savior said “It. Is. Finished.” Edited to add *thankfully*
The walk away.
Leaving emotions on the couch and remembering other things matter besides football.
